The results

My doctor finally called me with the results of the tissue sample today. But I guess I should go back a few days first...

Because of the oddness around my ovary that was found in the ultrasound, I needed to get my blood taken and test for the "pregnancy hormones" or hCG. I have to go back every two days to get it tested again to see if the levels are decreasing, staying the same or increasing. The expected is to have it decrease since that would mean the tissue that was passed was the baby and there isn't anything left in the uterus to keep your body producing these hCG hormones. If it is staying the same or increasing then I would have to probably have a D&C to remove any remaining tissue in my uterus or more tests/ultrasounds to determine an ectopic. It was a very slim chance it was a uterine AND ectopic as those are rare -- it would mean two eggs were released and fertilized with one going in the uterus and the other floating outside the uterus and tubes. So, I was tested on 1/25 and the hCG numbers were 1256 (very low for the 9 weeks I would have been) and again on 1/27 which were 285. It was a very good sign that they were low and decreasing so the doctor who called me with these results said that he was pretty sure my body was taking care of the miscarriage naturally.

My doctor called me today with the results from the tissue sample and also to confirm what the previous doctor had said about the hCG results. The tissue results had all the right amount and type of cells to indicate it was the fetus and the hCG levels also indicate the same thing. I actually stopped bleeding yesterday so I guess I am done with the physical aspect of this whole thing.

My emotional state is something else and I am surviving on chocolate and our family right now. I am so happy to have a happy and healthy little boy who amazes me everyday.

~Monica~

A sad, sad day

WARNING: There are some graphic descriptions in this post!





It started last night around 5pm when I felt something sticky in my underwear. I went to the bathroom and discovered it was blood. It wasn't a lot -- a few spots but it was bright red. I got a pad and started monitoring the flow. Thankfully my husband was on his way home to help me decide when to call the doctor. I did feel really gassy after lunch that day so I was really uncomfortable but I also felt like my period was starting -- achy and a heavy sensation.

The spotting was barely enough to stain the pad but it was definitely noticeable when I wiped. And I had to wipe a LOT too. For the most part it was a pinkish brown but it wasn't stopping so I finally called the doctor around 9pm. The on call doc said what I pretty much guessed -- that it is a 50/50 chance it is a miscarriage or just normal pregnancy bleeding. So, I was asked to rest and call if the situation got any worse.

So, after a fitful night of sleep I woke up to a pad not really full but certainly completely stained. It didn't seem to get less but instead a little heavier so I called the doctor's office again. The nurse called me back and said basically the same thing as the doctor the night before. I decided to come into the office today rather than wait for my scheduled appointment on Thursday. Luckily, my own doctor was available and was able to examine me. Nothing was really conclusive (uterus was the right size and I assume the cervix was closed) so she ordered an ultrasound to see what is really going on. I got the sense that whatever the outcome wasn't going to be good: another ectopic, a miscarriage or a placenta problem.

A few hours later, as I was going to the hospital to get the ultrasound ... I was kissing my husband goodbye when I felt something wet sliding out of me. I checked my pants and saw nothing and thought it was just some blood that had gotten backed up. I was lying down the entire time I had gotten home from the doctor's office until it was time to get the ultrasound. Well, a few seconds later I felt it again and when I checked it was definitely something large, fleshy and disturbing. It was about the size of my thumb and did not look anything like a blood clot. I didn't want to admit what it was or looked like but I believe now it was the gestational sac. I left it for my husband to put into a container and call the doctor's office to see what we should do with it.

I left for my ultrasound and after checking in and waiting around to be called in, I got a really chatty and friendly tech. I normally wouldn't have minded but I knew the outcome wasn't going to be good. My uterus is tipped back so usually nothing interesting can be seen from the over the tummy ultrasound. Everything was fine until the vaginal one when she got really quiet. That also happened during my ectopic but it was silent the entire time and they made me wait for the results instead of sending me home like they did today. So, I knew something was wrong but she couldn't tell me anything. There was definitely no heartbeat except my own.

I had to wait a few hours for the doctor to call me back but it wasn't good news. Basically the ultrasound was sort of "inconclusive" but there definitely wasn't anything in my uterus. There was something near my ovary but it could be part of my intestines or a possible ectopic. I will need more blood tests to rule it out one way or another. In any case, the pregnancy isn't viable anymore.

Also, my husband dropped off the tissue that I passed for tests but those won't be done for about a week.

~Monica~

PS: Originally posted on MySpace.

Brr, it's cold

So, I am getting a bit stir crazy and can't wait to get out of the house tomorrow. They are saying there might be more snow on Tuesday so tomorrow is my window of opportunity.

I can't believe the weather we have been having and it is wreaking havoc on all my planning for get togethers and Spa Parties too. Bah. For the past week, we have had snow and ice and temps in the 20's or low 30's. Yuck.

~Monica~

I finally did it

Ok, so I finally broke down and went maternity wear shopping. Finding pants that fit is so hard but I finally found two that I liked and they weren't too expensive either so that was good. I would feel better if I knew I was carrying twins or something but it's just my old baby fat that I never got rid of because I knew I was going to be preggo again soon.

So, my RN appointment went well and it was pretty uneventful. The whole family went and Davin had fun playing in the box of toys. The worst as usual was getting blood taken but at least I know what to expect now. I have to go back and pee in a cup again because the cup leaked on the way to the lab. The weather has prevented me from going but maybe soon I will venture out.

My first doctor appointment is scheduled for 1/24.

~Monica~

PS: Originally posted on MySpace.

Feeling Huge

I was supposed to have my first appointment today. It is the initial one with the nurse to go over your medical history and you get blood and urine samples taken. Not very exciting in any case but I just got a call from the doctor's office and they had to reschedule the RN appointment to next week. UGH. I don't remember when I called to find out if this was going to be treated as a normal pregnancy and the doctor on call (everytime I visit or call my doctor is out) basically confirmed that. Unless I am having symptoms that indicate otherwise, I should expect the normal treatment. Bummer. I really want special treatment just so I can ease my worries.
So my next appointment is on 1/10. I hope I can wait without too much worry.

I already feel huge and my pants are really uncomfortable. I don't really have any pants that are comfortable anymore and the only maternity jeans are too big right now. UGH.

~Monica~

PS: Originally posted on MySpace.