Worried

So, it has been a week and I finally got around to calling the doctor. I am just being paranoid about the pregnancy. I still don't feel pregnant except for being tired and hungry but I guess those can be big enough signs for most. I just worry about another ectopic pregnancy since my first (June 2003) ended up that way. I had no symptoms for that one except some spotting which quickly turned to bleeding. Luckily it was caught early and it was still small enough for methotrexate which means I didn't have to have surgery or loose any tubes.

I was just starting to remember what my last pregnancy was like and my boobs were definitely sore and they started testing my blood right away. I think because my doctor wasn't in the office when I got confirmed and they didn't pull my chart, I am on a normal schedule for testing. My first appointment with the nurse is on 1/4 but I have a call in to the on-call doctor to make sure that is still okay.

It is hard to be pregnant around the holidays because everyone knows I drink and it is pretty suspicious if I don't. I played off my stomach flu thing over Christmas and everyone seemed to buy it -- knock on wood. I even tried drinking just a little to appear normal but even that tiny amount made me feel very ill. We shall see how New Year's goes -- at least the friend hosting is aware of my situation.

I am not telling ANYONE until I at least get confirmation the baby is in my uterus. So far, two very close friends know but that is it. It is hard not to announce it to the world since we wanted it so much but at the same time I am constantly filled with worry that something is wrong. So, until the next time....

~Monica~

PS: Originally posted on MySpace.